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If you have ever thought you were too shy to have friends, think about a TV show or a book you’ve loved. You fall in love with the characters and you can’t wait for the next episode or chapter. Then inevitably, the story has to end. No, you don’t want it to end…you want it to go on. These people are real to you. When the story ends, they end too. It’s like losing a real friend. Well, here’s the good news–you can have real friends! You can follow their story as they follow yours. You can talk to them and they will talk back.
How do you find friends? You become a friend. Maybe you’ll have to step out of your comfort zone but just Ask. Ask people about themselves, what they do, what they like, what music they listen to, their family, their pet, their job where they were born, have they every bunji jumped on and on. Once someone begins talking they will think you are awesome. Don’t think you have nothing to say, either. Your story is fascinating because everyone’s story is different. Thinking you have nothing to say means you don’t think you have any significance. Believe me, you do because no one else’s story is like yours….and that makes you interesting.
Monday morning–a drag for most people, especially today since it’s raining. But, I like the rain today. It’s not business as usual when it rains. My husband isn’t playing golf so he brought me coffee with cinnamon, so that’s a plus right out of the chute. I had a great weekend with my kids–visiting from Michigan and Richmond, VA. My husband made his famous mustard potato salad and sloppy joe’s and I made my famous Ghirardelli brownies from Cosco. Wayne, who’s been a son-in-law the longest is a pretty tough guy who can do anything. He made his own solar collectors, gardens, and knows the secrets of the universe. He told the newest son-in-law, “When plans involve her family, she’s in charge. When plans involve my family, she’s in charge.” Over the weekend we laughed so much I actually had to take a long nap after they left. Then I had to eat the rest of the brownies. Wayne understands self-esteem– he can make fun of himself, take a back seat to his wife and still feel pretty darn good. And we all love him because of it.
Do you find yourself in a hurry all the time?
I don’t mean you’re late for your best friend’s wedding–and you’re in the wedding party. I mean hurrying…hurrying to get to a meeting, hurrying to fax something, hurrying your dog to “go,” telling your child to “hurry up,” feeling rushed, feeling like there’s not enough time, doing laundry at 11:00 p.m., taking your coffee, bagel, briefcase and the trash out with you in the morning–with the bagel between your teeth? Why are we so rushed? Because we have forgotten how to live. We have forgotten we are meaningful just by being. We have forgotten how pleasant it is to stroll with a relaxed body instead of straining forward like runners at the finish line. We try to fit too much stuff in a given period of time. True, I don’t want to wear my underwear two days in a row, but I have made a conscious decision to not hurry on the way to the washing machine. I will not rush myself, my dog, or my husband. I urge you to take the pledge. Let me hear from you if you do.
