Those $400 Jeans… Self Esteem? is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

Are you stuck in a rut? is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

We live in a city on the East coast and like many other cities, have had a lot of snow. Most of us have to park on the street and we have learned to squeeze three cars in spaces most people would only try to park two. We know that if we are careful, everyone usually gets a place to park. The snow has taken our parking places down by about 1/3 and those of us who get home late have to park blocks and blocks away. Not fun on a cold night, especially if you are toting groceries.

This person I mentioned took up two parking places for five days (no one knew whose car it was) even though someone had left a note on the car. Now the note wasn’t bad but it did have an edge to it. When the neighborhood found out whose car it was, someone approached her in person. Upon being asked to move her car, she was incensed. She said if the note had been nice, she would have moved it. Since that time, about three weeks now, even though she is the only person in her household she has consistently parked her two vehicles over four spaces. Despite attempts to mend this situation, she refuses to speak to anyone.

This is not about me. This is not about parking spaces. This is about how important our personhood is. Here is a person who probably has a long history of being wounded. She’s angry and wants to let people know she is somebody. If she had a good sense of self-worth, she would have said, “Geez-sorry, let me move it.”

Everyone deserves to be treated with respect. Our personhood, our soul, is given to us by God; this should be important enough in itself to remind us that hurting another person or ourselves is degrading and destructive. And it has a long tail…..

How Important Is Our Personhood? is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

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The holidays are a very dangerous time for self-esteem.  The last thing we need to do is measure self-worth based on gifts. There are hundreds of opportunities now to turn away from activities that involve comparing ourselves to others. You only need to look within yourself to know if you are doing the right things. Don’t allow someone else to set your priorities for you. If you hate to do outside lights, get a spotlight and devote yourself to visiting the animal shelter if that’s what you want. It’s better to have a happy house than a tension-filled one that wears 10,000 lights. This season, more than all the others, should encourage you to value yourself because you are already valued…there is already a reason you’re here.

The holidays are a dangerous time for self-esteem is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

We wear our mask to work, smiling to hiding the strain of the fight we had last night with our partner. We wear a confident mask as we use our credit card, hoping it won’t be rejected. And every mask we put on makes us feel less certain of ourselves, makes us feel more and more like a fraud. Confidence and self-esteem building come when we don’t use our masks to cover our feelings. Oh, we’re not going to go into the office in the midst of wracking sobs after that argument with our partner, but neither should we feel like a failure for having an upsetting disagreement.

Improving self esteem means being realistic about who we are. Sometimes, we make mistakes, say the wrong things. That doesn’t make us bad people. Low self-esteem demons begin to help us beat ourselves up and say we’re too broken to ever be fixed. These feelings begin to diminish when we take responsibility and try again.  Improving self-esteem means looking at what happened and how we got there and becoming aware of what we have to do to avoid the situation again.

Self-esteem building comes when we don’t use masks to cover feelings is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

Low self-esteem is the same thing as being a negative thinker. All you focus on are the things you can’t do or should have done better. If you put yourself down like this all the time, you won’t even want to be around yourself! To build self-esteem, focus on the things at which you have been successful, no matter how small. God did not put you on earth to hate yourself. By focusing on what you do well, why you are here will become clearer. You are your best source for building self-esteem in yourself and in your children. Focus on the positive for one day. See the difference it makes. Tell me about your experience. Write me back or call me at (540) 455-4186.

Low self-esteem is the same thing as being a negative thinker. is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

If they are building a sand castle, let THEM build it. You may help minimally, such as demonstrating, but then sit back and let them do it. Tell them they built a good sand castle, that you like the way they learned how to mix the right amount of sand and water, etc. but do not tell them “Good Job.” They hear too much of that–it is a distracted and tired phrase which has lost its meaning. Be specific in your praise–but do not over-praise. This makes a child feel successful in their own mind–which is where self-confidence really resides.

How to help low self esteem, especially in children is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth

Family is like a Poker Hand is a post from: Terry Diebold on the Value of Self Worth