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How important is feeling good? It is extremely important! One of the things I notice about people I meet is how much they take their bodies for granted–and a good percentage of time feeling good is blocked by what is going on in our bodies. I am talking to YOU!!! You will have a hard time feeling good if: you don’t get enough sleep, you eat too much sugar, you do not absorb nutrients because of a poor digestive system, you are constipated or have diarrhea often, you drink soda, worry, are angry, yell a lot, swallow your anger, take medication, eat processed foods, smoke, don’t exercise, don’t take a good multivitamin, drink too much alcohol, have medical conditions you ignore (high blood pressure, diabetes, low thyroid) have food allergies (dairy, wheat), live with mold, have a toxic relationship or toxic working conditions.
ALL of these affect your health by lowering your resistance to disease, increasing your own body’s attacks on itself (autoimmune disorders) and causing dangerously low mineral and vitamin deficiencies. Yikes–you may say, I engage in a lot of these behaviors! Even if you did all of these things, you can start with just one. Pick one with the understanding that every little bit you do can make a difference in your happiness. Just the psychological effects of knowing you are tackling something in your life that is harmful to you makes a difference. Feeling good is a natural thing–but just like a cold can block our ability to breathe well, our behaviors can block our ability to feel happy. Give happiness a fighting chance–start a new habit today!
If you have ever thought you were too shy to have friends, think about a TV show or a book you’ve loved. You fall in love with the characters and you can’t wait for the next episode or chapter. Then inevitably, the story has to end. No, you don’t want it to end…you want it to go on. These people are real to you. When the story ends, they end too. It’s like losing a real friend. Well, here’s the good news–you can have real friends! You can follow their story as they follow yours. You can talk to them and they will talk back.
How do you find friends? You become a friend. Maybe you’ll have to step out of your comfort zone but just Ask. Ask people about themselves, what they do, what they like, what music they listen to, their family, their pet, their job where they were born, have they every bunji jumped on and on. Once someone begins talking they will think you are awesome. Don’t think you have nothing to say, either. Your story is fascinating because everyone’s story is different. Thinking you have nothing to say means you don’t think you have any significance. Believe me, you do because no one else’s story is like yours….and that makes you interesting.
Monday morning–a drag for most people, especially today since it’s raining. But, I like the rain today. It’s not business as usual when it rains. My husband isn’t playing golf so he brought me coffee with cinnamon, so that’s a plus right out of the chute. I had a great weekend with my kids–visiting from Michigan and Richmond, VA. My husband made his famous mustard potato salad and sloppy joe’s and I made my famous Ghirardelli brownies from Cosco. Wayne, who’s been a son-in-law the longest is a pretty tough guy who can do anything. He made his own solar collectors, gardens, and knows the secrets of the universe. He told the newest son-in-law, “When plans involve her family, she’s in charge. When plans involve my family, she’s in charge.” Over the weekend we laughed so much I actually had to take a long nap after they left. Then I had to eat the rest of the brownies. Wayne understands self-esteem– he can make fun of himself, take a back seat to his wife and still feel pretty darn good. And we all love him because of it.
If you are stuck or in a rut, a good way to get unstuck is to change a routine. Find an accountibility friend and tell them everyday what you WILL accomplish that day. Write a note and mail it instead of emailing, read instead of watching TV, watch a funny TV show instead of listening to sad or heavy music, cut your hair, grow your hair, fix a new recipe, throw out stuff with additives, get up earlier, clean out a closet, bake, go to a new store you’ve never been to, walk the dog a different way. We are deeply influenced by what we do and while some routines are comforting, others lull us into feeling powerless over our lives. We are responsible for our own happiness and the way we feel about ourselves. We can change what we don’t like.
I just celebrated my birthday. Does this seem like a silly thing to tell you? Everyone has one and mine isn’t particularly special except it is on St. Patrick’s Day. I get to drink green (or any color) beer with unabashed pleasure on St. Patrick’s Day but that isn’t the reason I’m telling you this. Birthdays are important because we are each important. I know this is so and I think you should know so too. Unless you are the president, there just aren’t that many days that celebrate, not what we’ve done, but who we are. We are supposed to celebrate ourselves just because we were born. Hmmm.
Most people dread January, February and March because they seem like dreary winter months where nothing is going on. I happen to love these three months because they provide a breather for us all after the madness of Thanksgiving and Christmas, before Easter and summer. They are the months where we can catch up on projects and stop running so much. Our regular lives are chaotic enough without all the extras of holiday planning, guests and extra meals.
Some people, though, don’t know what to do when they aren’t running around. They like being busy because they don’t have to think about problems and issues that are bothering them.
I will tell you a secret: The more you don’t deal with your issues, the more power they have over you. They become more inscrutable because they are vague and seem to float away from us when we “remember” we have a problem. Sit down with yourself, write down what you think the problem is. Then write down what you would tell a friend if she or he had the same problem. Just the act of writing it down helps because you have finally taken control. Obviously some problems are more easily solvable than others but taking a step is a start–a good start to freeing up your Spring.
It doesn’t happen to me very often, but this week I had an encounter with an pretty nasty person. In fact, this person was so nasty that it has caused me to think hard about people who go out of their way to cause others difficulties.
We live in a city on the East coast and like many other cities, have had a lot of snow. Most of us have to park on the street and we have learned to squeeze three cars in spaces most people would only try to park two. We know that if we are careful, everyone usually gets a place to park. The snow has taken our parking places down by about 1/3 and those of us who get home late have to park blocks and blocks away. Not fun on a cold night, especially if you are toting groceries.
This person I mentioned took up two parking places for five days (no one knew whose car it was) even though someone had left a note on the car. § Read the rest of this entry…
Cover via Amazon
Fluzzard
For me, it’s not only been the Blizzard of 2010 but the flu. There is a difference. Had it just been the blizzard I would have been looking busy but really just wasting time. The flu, however, kept me stuck on the sofa so I ended up watching old movies– wonderful, funny, tragical and magical movies.
Coming back to the real world put me in touch with the fact that we are so eager to move on to the next new thing that we give short shrift to anything not so new. A movie comes out and within two weeks, it’s on DVD. Good songs are only good for a couple of weeks. No wonder people feel insecure about themselves. Any success is immediately overshadowed by the implication that if it’s not the latest thing, it’s not as good. We don’t take time to savor, to take our place in the universe—or if we do, it’s only for 15 minutes. Here are some movies that have much to say and that we need to hear…again and again.
Network—the writing is phenomenal and so is the plot. § Read the rest of this entry…
Image via Wikipedia
The holidays are a very dangerous time for self-esteem. The last thing we need to do is measure self-worth based on gifts. There are hundreds of opportunities now to turn away from activities that involve comparing ourselves to others. You only need to look within yourself to know if you are doing the right things. Don’t allow someone else to set your priorities for you. If you hate to do outside lights, get a spotlight and devote yourself to visiting the animal shelter if that’s what you want. It’s better to have a happy house than a tension-filled one that wears 10,000 lights. This season, more than all the others, should encourage you to value yourself because you are already valued…there is already a reason you’re here.
I am lucky enough to be on a train right now. It’s dark but that’s okay. I still love the swaying, rhythmic movement that is beginning to make me sleepy.
There are two phone conversations I’m trying not to listen to–difficult because I can hear every word. These people think they are having a private chat but the rest of us know that the girl in row five is incensed with her boyfriend and the man a few seats up has, for reasons we can only guess, found it necessary to state over and over that he is a very busy person.
Something has been lost with the advent of this media-mad world. § Read the rest of this entry…
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How important is feeling good? It is extremely important! One of the things I notice about people I meet is how much they take their bodies for granted–and a good percentage of time feeling good is blocked by what is going on in our bodies. I am talking to YOU!!! You will have a hard time feeling good if: you don’t get enough sleep, you eat too much sugar, you do not absorb nutrients because of a poor digestive system, you are constipated or have diarrhea often, you drink soda, worry, are angry, yell a lot, swallow your anger, take medication, eat processed foods, smoke, don’t exercise, don’t take a good multivitamin, drink too much alcohol, have medical conditions you ignore (high blood pressure, diabetes, low thyroid) have food allergies (dairy, wheat), live with mold, have a toxic relationship or toxic working conditions.
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