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How important is feeling good?

§ June 11th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Positive Esteem, Self Awareness, Self Esteem Women, Teenage Esteem § No Comments

How important is feeling good?  It is extremely important!  One of the things I notice about people I meet is how much they take their bodies for granted–and a good percentage of time feeling good is blocked by what is going on in our bodies. I am talking to YOU!!!  You will have a hard time feeling good if: you don’t get enough sleep, you eat too much sugar, you do not absorb nutrients because of a poor digestive system, you are constipated or have diarrhea often, you drink soda, worry, are angry, yell a lot, swallow your anger, take medication, eat processed foods, smoke, don’t exercise, don’t take a good multivitamin, drink too much alcohol, have medical conditions you ignore (high blood pressure, diabetes, low thyroid) have food allergies (dairy, wheat), live with mold, have a toxic relationship or toxic working conditions.

ALL of these affect your health by lowering your resistance to disease, increasing your own body’s attacks on itself (autoimmune disorders) and causing dangerously low mineral and vitamin deficiencies. Yikes–you may say, I engage in a lot of these behaviors!  Even if you did all of these things, you can start with just one. Pick one with the understanding that every little bit you do can make a difference in your happiness. Just the psychological effects of knowing you are tackling something in your life that is harmful to you makes a difference. Feeling good is a natural thing–but just like a cold can block our ability to breathe well, our behaviors can block our ability to feel happy. Give happiness a fighting chance–start a new habit today!

Be glad every day you wake up

§ June 1st, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Self Awareness § No Comments

One day, without any warning, I was overcome with an addiction. Because I can’t get my work done, I thought going public with my secret would help. I discovered the Eagles of Hornby Island, (http://www.wildearth.tv/web/dch-hornby-01) two of whom nest on Doug Carrick’s property. Working with wildlife officials, Doug placed a number of cameras in and around the eagle’s nest and, except when it is dark, the eagles are on camera. Currently there is a month-old eaglet named Phoenix that has been on camera since the day he hatched. This is where my times goes–eyes fixated on my computer, watching in awe as mom and dad know exactly when it’s time to bring fish to the nest, agog as the eaglet eat huge amounts of fish–and an opossum–and grows visibly by the hour.

It would never occur to Phoenix–if he were to be able to think–that food wouldn’t be there when he is hungry. He plays with sticks, his parents’ claws, sleeps and eats. How wonderful if our life was that easy–but it isn’t. And we were never promised it would be easy. That is the stuff of fairy tales. Our lives are real and with reality, comes, good and bad, ups and downs, happy and sad. There is nothing wrong with you if your life has problems! No one’s life goes smoothly all the time. If your problems are stubborn or hurtful get help. Be glad every day you wake up–and if you need help, it is out there…unless you’re hooked on the Hornby Island Eagles.

Monday Morning

§ May 17th, 2010 § Filed under Positive Esteem, Relationships, Self Awareness § No Comments

Monday morning–a drag for most people, especially today since it’s raining. But, I like the rain today. It’s not business as usual when it rains. My husband isn’t playing golf so he brought me coffee with cinnamon, so that’s a plus right out of the chute. I had a great weekend with my kids–visiting from Michigan and Richmond, VA.   My husband made his famous mustard potato salad and sloppy joe’s and I made my famous Ghirardelli brownies from Cosco. Wayne, who’s been a son-in-law the longest is a pretty tough guy who can do anything. He made his own solar collectors, gardens, and knows the secrets of the universe. He told the newest son-in-law, “When plans involve her family, she’s in charge. When plans involve my family, she’s in charge.”  Over the weekend we laughed so much I actually had to take a long nap after they left. Then I had to eat the rest of the brownies. Wayne understands self-esteem– he can make fun of himself, take a back seat to his wife and still feel pretty darn good. And we all love him because of it.

Are You Tired of Rushing?

§ May 12th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Self Awareness, Self Esteem Women § No Comments

Do you find yourself in a hurry all the time?

I don’t mean you’re late for your best friend’s wedding–and you’re in the wedding party. I mean hurrying…hurrying to get to a meeting, hurrying to fax something, hurrying your dog to “go,” telling your child to “hurry up,” feeling rushed, feeling like there’s not enough time, doing laundry at 11:00 p.m., taking your coffee, bagel, briefcase and the trash out with you in the morning–with the bagel between your teeth?  Why are we so rushed? Because we have forgotten how to live. We have forgotten we are meaningful just by being. We have forgotten how pleasant it is to stroll with a relaxed body instead of straining forward like runners at the finish line. We try to fit too much stuff in a given period of time. True, I don’t want to wear my underwear two days in a row, but I have made a conscious decision to not hurry on the way to the washing machine. I will not rush myself, my dog, or my husband. I urge you to take the pledge. Let me hear from you if you do.

Are you stuck in a rut?

§ April 16th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Low Self Esteem Issues, Positive Esteem, Self Awareness § 1 Comment

If you are stuck or in a rut, a good way to get unstuck is to change a routine. Find an accountibility friend and tell them everyday what you WILL accomplish that day. Write a note and mail it instead of emailing, read instead of watching TV, watch a funny TV show instead of listening to sad or heavy music, cut your hair, grow your hair, fix a new recipe, throw out stuff with additives, get up earlier, clean out a closet, bake, go to a new store you’ve never been to, walk the dog a different way. We are deeply influenced by what we do and while some routines are comforting, others lull us into feeling powerless over our lives. We are responsible for our own happiness and the way we feel about ourselves. We can change what we don’t like.

Most people dread January, February and March

§ March 4th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Positive Esteem, Self Awareness § No Comments

Most people dread January, February and March because they seem like dreary winter months where nothing is going on. I happen to love these three months because they provide a breather for us all after the madness of Thanksgiving and Christmas, before Easter and summer.  They are the months where we can catch up on projects and stop running so much. Our regular lives are chaotic enough without all the extras of holiday planning, guests and extra meals.

Some people, though, don’t know what to do when they aren’t running around. They like being busy because they don’t have to think about problems and issues that are bothering them.
I will tell you a secret: The more you don’t deal with your issues, the more power they have over you. They become more inscrutable because they are vague and seem to float away from us when we “remember” we have a problem. Sit down with yourself, write down what you think the problem is. Then write down what you would tell a friend if she or he had the same problem. Just the act of writing it down helps because you have finally taken control. Obviously some problems are more easily solvable than others but taking a step is a start–a good start to freeing up your Spring.

How Important Is Our Personhood?

§ February 23rd, 2010 § Filed under Low Self Esteem Issues, Positive Esteem, Self Awareness § No Comments

It doesn’t happen to me very often, but this week I had an encounter with an pretty nasty person. In fact, this person was so nasty that it has caused me to think hard about people who go out of their way to cause others difficulties.

We live in a city on the East coast and like many other cities, have had a lot of snow. Most of us have to park on the street and we have learned to squeeze three cars in spaces most people would only try to park two. We know that if we are careful, everyone usually gets a place to park. The snow has taken our parking places down by about 1/3 and those of us who get home late have to park blocks and blocks away. Not fun on a cold night, especially if you are toting groceries.

This person I mentioned took up two parking places for five days (no one knew whose car it was) even though someone had left a note on the car. § Read the rest of this entry…

Reminder to love your life from favorite classic movies

§ February 14th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Positive Esteem, Self Awareness § 1 Comment

Cover of "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner (4...

Cover via Amazon

Fluzzard

For me, it’s not only been the Blizzard of 2010 but the flu. There is a difference. Had it just been the blizzard I would have been looking busy but really just wasting time. The flu, however, kept me stuck on the sofa so I ended up watching old movies– wonderful, funny, tragical and magical movies.

Coming back to the real world put me in touch with the fact that we are so eager to move on to the next new thing that we give short shrift to anything not so new.  A movie comes out and within two weeks, it’s on DVD. Good songs are only good for a couple of weeks. No wonder people feel insecure about themselves. Any success is immediately overshadowed by the implication that if it’s not the latest thing, it’s not as good. We don’t take time to savor, to take our place in the universe—or if we do, it’s only for 15 minutes.  Here are some movies that have much to say and that we need to hear…again and again.

Network—the writing is phenomenal and so is the plot. § Read the rest of this entry…

Time alone for listening to your soul and building self awareness

§ February 5th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Self Awareness § Tagged , , § 1 Comment

I’m a night owl. I have stayed up late as long as I can remember. My mom was one too and some of my most treasured memories were raiding the fridge at 2:30 with her after we watched an old movie or worked a crossword. She used to laugh and say anything eaten straight from the fridge had no calories.  Nighttime is special for those of us who clean closets at midnight or watch the Veg-o-matic demonstrations in the dark. We are alone with ourselves, no phones, no interruptions. Even ‘though the TV might be on, or we might have a book in our lap, we are alone. Do you ever have time alone? Time to hear the thoughts you drown out during the day? Thoughts that can be troubling, creative, scary, exciting. Don’t keep them away… your soul is talking to you. Time alone is for listening to your soul and building self awareness.

Every day you have a choice of complaining or rejoicing.

§ January 25th, 2010 § Filed under Love Your Life, Self Awareness § Tagged , , § No Comments

My guess is we are all reflecting right now on how lucky we are compared to the people of Haiti. It is intriguing that before the earthquake people were bemoaning the fact that the economy is bad and that they’ve had to cut back, they’re not eating out as much, not going to the movies. These complaints feel embarrassing and ridiculous as we hear of a survivor who has lost 5 children and see endless lines of people waiting in the blistering sun….for one bottle of water.  This is about more than counting your blessings—this is about recognizing that life is how you see it. Every day you have a choice of complaining or rejoicing. My hope for you is that you absorb this profoundly important concept…and that you wake every day and say, “Here We Go—another day to experience miracles.”

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