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I’m a night owl. I have stayed up late as long as I can remember. My mom was one too and some of my most treasured memories were raiding the fridge at 2:30 with her after we watched an old movie or worked a crossword. She used to laugh and say anything eaten straight from the fridge had no calories. Nighttime is special for those of us who clean closets at midnight or watch the Veg-o-matic demonstrations in the dark. We are alone with ourselves, no phones, no interruptions. Even ‘though the TV might be on, or we might have a book in our lap, we are alone. Do you ever have time alone? Time to hear the thoughts you drown out during the day? Thoughts that can be troubling, creative, scary, exciting. Don’t keep them away… your soul is talking to you. Time alone is for listening to your soul and building self awareness.
My guess is we are all reflecting right now on how lucky we are compared to the people of Haiti. It is intriguing that before the earthquake people were bemoaning the fact that the economy is bad and that they’ve had to cut back, they’re not eating out as much, not going to the movies. These complaints feel embarrassing and ridiculous as we hear of a survivor who has lost 5 children and see endless lines of people waiting in the blistering sun….for one bottle of water. This is about more than counting your blessings—this is about recognizing that life is how you see it. Every day you have a choice of complaining or rejoicing. My hope for you is that you absorb this profoundly important concept…and that you wake every day and say, “Here We Go—another day to experience miracles.”

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The holidays are a very dangerous time for self-esteem. The last thing we need to do is measure self-worth based on gifts. There are hundreds of opportunities now to turn away from activities that involve comparing ourselves to others. You only need to look within yourself to know if you are doing the right things. Don’t allow someone else to set your priorities for you. If you hate to do outside lights, get a spotlight and devote yourself to visiting the animal shelter if that’s what you want. It’s better to have a happy house than a tension-filled one that wears 10,000 lights. This season, more than all the others, should encourage you to value yourself because you are already valued…there is already a reason you’re here.
I am lucky enough to be on a train right now. It’s dark but that’s okay. I still love the swaying, rhythmic movement that is beginning to make me sleepy.
There are two phone conversations I’m trying not to listen to–difficult because I can hear every word. These people think they are having a private chat but the rest of us know that the girl in row five is incensed with her boyfriend and the man a few seats up has, for reasons we can only guess, found it necessary to state over and over that he is a very busy person.
Something has been lost with the advent of this media-mad world. § Read the rest of this entry…
As we head toward Thanksgiving, the remnants of Halloween remind me that when we get together with family and friends, sometimes we wear masks in an effort to make other people think we are someone we are not. We wear our masks in hopes people will give us “treats” in the way of praise and affirmation.
We wear our mask to work, smiling to hiding the strain of the fight we had last night with our partner. We wear a confident mask as we use our credit card, hoping it won’t be rejected. And every mask we put on makes us feel less certain of ourselves, makes us feel more and more like a fraud. § Read the rest of this entry…
Gain awareness of your own business self esteem. Is your heart telling you that you have a terrific business simmering inside of you, but your head says ‘no?’ This week’s radio show of Relatively Speaking may be exactly the show you’ve been needing to hear. Join Terry Diebold as she interviews Melanie Yost, a national expert, on “Growing Your Business from the Inside out.”
Relatively Speaking is Terry Diebold’s weekly Radio Show on webtalkradio.net. “Relatively Speaking” tackles the one issue that faces each of us every day–Relationships, both personal and business.
Today, I would like for you to take a little test. I would like you to jot down when you are feeling good and what you did to make yourself feel good. I would also like you to jot down when you are feeling not-so-good and why. I am talking about mood, not the H1N1 flu. If at the end of the day you have 4 or more times you feel not-so-good, then I want you to ask yourself, does feeling positive about myself depend on other people? Are you waiting for someone else to reward you—and if they don’t, is that when you feel bad? If so, I have some terrific news for you. IT DOESN’T HAVE TO BE LIKE THIS!!!! § Read the rest of this entry…
Have you ever had a friend who was so negative you didn’t want to be around him? On a sunny day he would say, “Yes, but it’s going to rain later.” After a good movie, “The amount of money actors are paid makes me sick.”
Low self-esteem is the same thing as being a negative thinker. All you focus on are the things you can’t do or should have done better. If you put yourself down like this all the time, you won’t even want to be around yourself! To build self-esteem, focus on the things at which you have been successful, no matter how small. God did not put you on earth to hate yourself. § Read the rest of this entry…
How do you get your emotional “place” back on track? You have already begun if you recognize that you don’t feel grounded and comfortable. Ask yourself—is there anywhere in my life where I am not authentic? Do I agree when I really disagree? Do I pretend to be someone’s friend when I’m not? Am I pushing away truths I don’t want to hear? Do I deny myself the same pleasure I would urge someone else to embrace? You are who you are—and sometimes you need work. But before that comes being really, really, really truthful with yourself and the life you are living.
Your emotional “place” is where you feel grounded and comfortable. It is the place where your soul lives. It is a source of intuition and inspiration. It is the terror you felt when you were five and got lost. It is the pride you felt when you made your first dollar. It is jealousy and anger, selflessness and selfishness. It is mature and at the same time childish. It is the truest part of you, the part you know to be the essence of who you are. When you ignore this part of yourself, you are out of emotional “place.”
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